Name: Shina Age: 18 Birthday: 18Jan91 School: SP, DCMD 2A 01, SDZ
Loves dancing, designing,>
singing, day dreaming,
strumming.
What I Want: JJ Lin World Tour 2009 Concert JJ Lin's 6th album
learn Beat Boxing New Shoes
switch jobs Pink skull and crossbones hoody
iPod Classic Avril Lavigne's concert more shirts! studded belt
Time
some kind of understanding
be myself
some kind care and concern
be happy
i have a lot to vent. i don't think it's worth the effort anymore. i wanna quit. ya, i'll tell them that i'm gonna quit. just watch me. damn it. i'm so bad at this. why me in the first place? was it a random choice? why why why why? looks like i haven't contributed enough. so they're asking for more. how much more? so it's just me. it's always me. we're all in the same boat right? so i'm just complaining and not doing anything. i'm not helping the situation. i knew i wasn't a good enough person. i was never good enough for anyone anyway.
the time is right; {12:25 AM}
posted on Friday, September 4, 2009
Harumahn nibahng eui chim nae gah dwei goh shipuh (oh baby) [kim jae joong] Duh ddah seu hee poh geun hee nae poom eh gahm ssah ahn goh [muht jin oui moh kim jae joong] Jae oo goh shipuh
Nae gah uhp neun nuh eui hahroon [kim jae joong] Uh duh geh heul ruh gah neun guhn jee Nah reul uhl mah nah sarang hah neun jee Nahn nuh moo nah goong geum hahn deh (goong geumhae~) [dongbangshingi]
Nuh eui jahk eun suh rahm sohk eui [kim joon soo] Eel gee jahng ee dwei goh shipuh Ahl soo uhp neun nuh eui geu bee meel doh Nae mahm sohk eh dahm ah dool rae Nuh mohl rae [mahl geun young hohn kim joon soo]
Hah roo mahn nuh eui goh yahng ee gah dwei goh shipuh [uh reen wahng jah shim chang min] Nee gah joo neun mahd eet neun oo yoo wah Boo deu ruh oon nee poom ahn eh suh [shim chang min] Oom jeek ee neun jahng nahn eh doh Nuh eui gwei yuh oon eem maht choom eh Nah doh ool rae jeel too reul Neu ggee doh ee suh nah bwah [kah ree soo mah jung yoon ho]
Nae mah eum ee ee ruhn guh yah Nuh bahk gehn bohl soo uhp neun guh jee Noogoo reul bwah doh uh dee ee suh doh Nahn nuh mahn bah rah boh jahn hah [dongbangshingi]
Dahn ha roo mahn ah joo chin hahn [shim chang min] Nuh eui ae een ee dwei goh shipuh [uh reen wahng jah shim chang min]
Nuh eui jah rahng doh ddae rohn too juhng doh Dah deul eul soo ee seul tehn deh Nuhl wee hae
In my heart in my soul Nah eh geh sarang ee rahn Ah jeek uh saek hajimahn Ee seh sahng moh deun guhl nuh eh geh joo goh shipuh Ggoom eh suh rah doh [dong.bang.shin.gi.jjang.]
Nae mah eum ee ee ruhn guh yah [uh reen wahng jah shim changmin] Jee kyuh bohl soo mahn ee suh doh Nuh moo kamsa hae mahn hee hengbok hae Nah joh geum eun boo johk hae doh [kim joon soo]
Uhn jeh ggah jee nuh eui gyuht eh Yuhn een eu roh eet goh shipuh Nuh reul nae poom eh (nee gah nae poom eh) Gah deuk ahn eun chae Geud uh buh ryuh seu myuhn shipuh Young wohn hee. [dong.bang.shin.gi.jjang.]
the time is right; {9:41 AM}
posted on Sunday, August 30, 2009
i have a super duper ridiculously crazy obsession now... SHINee!!! And i'm going to korea during the second last week of holidays!!!! wheee!!!! awesome shit and life IS sweet afterall... I love Key!!! 김기범, 사랑해요...!!!! i'm hoping to bum into him on the streets while we're there... XD and then can take picture!!! wheee!!!! too bad that up till now, i STILL don't have a digital cam... one would think that by the age if 18, you shld at least have a digital cam... but NOOOO... all i got is my darling 2 megapixel camera phone... which is currently spoiled... T_T gotta go get it fixed... haix...
the time is right; {10:08 PM}
posted on Wednesday, August 12, 2009
just thought i'd upload something different today...
my cousin's going to America, and i'm gonna miss him so much.
more than i can say, he's the only cousin i can talk to about dance.
the other cousin that i have who is also a dancer, i don't talk to her all that often.
i don't understand why my family can go on and on about my size,
but my friends can accept me for who i am.
they can go on about my looks, my hair, the condition of my skin,
my weight problem but they never tell me that i'm good at something.
they only say it when they see it.
they don't tell me that they believe in me.
they don't encourage me in dance.
everytime, day and night, studies studies studies.
hey, i haven't seen you in almost a year and all you can talk
about to me is my studies?
what about the basic, how are you? are you getting enough sleep?
are you eating well? is poly life stressful?
all they ever talk about is how i have to work hard to survive.
All. The. Time.
every single one of them, the same old thing.
i want to stop going to gatherings altogether, because if the stress they give me.
the unwanted, un-needed, extra stress.
i know they're concern about my health.
i mean, aren't i aware that i'm already overweight?
tell me something that i don't know about myself.
i just dunno what i'd do without him. really.
he's been through what i have and more.
he got the guts to pursue what he really loves and more.
i am not saying that i would love to be in his place.
but i just dunno how to deal without someone to confide in.
just when i found someone in the family that i can relate to...
it's only two months, but to me, two months is like forever.
i know that i've got to learn to be independant.
but sometimes, i need someone to lean on.
i need someone for support.
i give support to my friends because i love them.
i give support to my family because i love and adore them,
no matter what and how they treat me.
all i need is that one person to be there for me, day and night.
supports me unconditionally, willingly and without question.
it's so much to ask, but now, i really need that someone.
aren't i just pathetic? to ask for so much but give nothing in return?
i'm actually asking for support for myself, something i've never done
and never thought that i would ever need to do.
i am so pathetic as to cry over something like this.
maybe it's just mood swings, or that i'm in real pain.
or in real need of that someone, or something.
i've realized that the more i try to be happier, the sadder i become.
i havent felt like this in such a long time.
it's killing me slowly, but surely.
i don't want to give up on life altogether.
but why do i feel so much pain?
the time is right; {2:43 PM}
posted on Monday, August 10, 2009
it's been so long since i've updated anything here... my life's so fast paced that i can't keep track of anything anymore... i didn't know that my cousin had given birth already... i didn't that my other cousin was going back to america with his family already... it's hard to keep track these days but i try my best...
on a happier note, my mum bought me a new table and movable storage rack... hahaha... whee!!! now i have proper table down here... i dunno what i'm gonna do with the table on the platform... maybe i'll use it as storage space again... =P
Assignment deadlines are so close... Young NTUC is due on the 19th August, Coffee table book due on 4th of September (last day of school). YAY... holidays after that!!!
not much to blog about my life cause it's still the same old same old thing... dance, design, dance, design, dance, design, HIVE PARTY... yeap... now on to researching on brochure design... haha... =P
the time is right; {10:28 AM}
posted on Monday, July 27, 2009
everytime i take a chance and believe in people,
i only ever get utter disappointment in return....
Please don't make me stop wanting to believe in you,
that we can work together.
I don't want to break anymore bonds of friendship.
Please.
the time is right; {11:16 AM}
posted on Tuesday, July 21, 2009
you rocked my world MJ, RIP.
i'm tired... cause the fan's blowing into my eyes, making them dry up like a prune...
i'm sick of school, sick of life...
sick of assignments...
it seems like school's not important right now...
it sucks to feel this way cause my grades are on the line,
and the fees are NOT CHEAP...
i'm afraid i'm gonna screw up so bad...
Why am i thinking about this only now?
Why have i become so un-enthusiastic about school?
Was it because being sick for a week, classes being cancelled or is because i'm becoming plain lazy that i'm feeling this way?
I don't like this feeling at all...
I feel so far away from where the rest of my classmates are...
It sucks to feel this way...
I have lost that drive that kept me going the whole of last year...
