i can't stop giggling after i watched the movie on watch-movie.net
the movie makes me happy... JOHN TRAVOLTA makes me smile all the time in his musicals!!! lols... i've been crushing on him since the first time my mum let me watch grease... yeah... haha...

well not much happened during the last few day of which i didn't post... actually nothing happened... so yeah...

went for awards ceremony yesterday at SJC... it felt good to be back home... so sad that they changed the school mission.... at least they didn't change the school vision... i mean, the old mission was perfect for us... the new one however, seemed too politically correct for our school... oh well let them do whatever they want...

i'm gonna watch it again!!! yayness!!! lols...

so i'm going to meet nicole later in the afternoon.... we're going to the body shop warehouse sale at suntect!!!

i officially have a new obsession..... HAIRSPRAY!!!!
yupp... i am now a checker board chick!!! haha....
and hence, the song on my blog... yupp...
it's Zac Efron, Nikki Blondsky, Amanda Bynes and Elijah Kelley... Without Love...
oh man the lyrics are sooo corny and cheesy but i love it!!!! haha....

LINK
Once I was a selfish fool
Who never understood
I never looked inside myself
Though on the outside, I looked good!

Then we met and you made me
The man I am today
Tracy, I'm in love with you
No matter what you weigh
'Cause...

LINK (& ENSEMBLE)
Without love
Life is like the seasons with
No summer
Without love
Life is rock 'n' roll without
A drummer

Tracy, I'll be yours forever
'Cause I never wanna be
Without love
Tracy, never set me free
No, I ain't lyin'
Never set me free, Tracy,
No, no, no!!

SEAWEED
Living in the ghetto
Black is everywhere you go
Who'd have thought I'd love a girl
Whose skin as white as winter's snow

PENNY
In my ivory tower
Life was just a hostess snack
But now I've tasted chocolate
And I'm never going back

PENNY & SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
'Cause without love

SEAWEED
Life is like a beat that you can't follow

PENNY & SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
Without love

PENNY
Life is Doris Day at the Apollo

PENNY & SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
Darling, I'll be yours forever
'Cause I never wanna be
Without love

SEAWEED
So darling, never set me free
No!

PENNY & SEAWEED
I'm yours forever
Never set me free

ENSEMBLE
No, no, no!

LINK
If I'm left without my baby doll
I don't know what I'll do

TRACY
Link, I've got to break out
So that I can get my hands on you

SEAWEED
And girl, if I can't touch you
Now I'm gonna lose control

PENNY
Seaweed, you're my black white knight
I've found my blue-eyed soul

SEAWEED & ENSEMBLE
Sweet freedom is our goal

LINK
Trace, I wanna kiss ya!

TRACY
Let me out at the next toll!

ALL
Without love

SEAWEED
Life is like a prom
that won't invite us

ALL
Without love

LINK
Life's getting my big break
and laryngitis

ALL
Without love

Penny
Life's a '45'
when you can't buy it

ALL
Without love

TRACY
Life is like my mother
on a diet

ALL
Like a week that's only Mondays
Only ice cream, never sundaes
Like a circle with no center
Like a door marked "do not enter!"



DARLING, I'LL BE YOURS FOREVER
'Cause I never wanna be...

Without love

PENNY & LINK
Yes now you've captured me

ENSEMBLE
Without love

SEAWEED & TRACY
I surrender happily

ENSEMBLE
Without love

PENNY
Oh seaweed
Never set me free

PENNY & SEAWEED
No, no, no

TRACY & LINK
No, I ain't lyin'

PENNY & SEAWEED
Never set me free

ALL
No, no, no
No, I dont wanna live without

PENNY
Love, love, love

LINK
Yeah, yeah, yeah

ALL
Darling, you had best believe me,
Never leave me
without love!

well it's 5.27 in the morning and i've just finished watching Grease on watch-movies... i loved it! it's one of the old school musicals that you can never get tired of watching, even if you tried!

i hope you guys liked the hamster clips i found on youtube... oh and there are also clips on teaching you how to breed hamsters... it's not like there are not enough rodents in this world already... but whatever...

so i went online and chatted with a few people... maybe two or three... then i find out that a number of people have actually blocked me or deleted me from their contacts... so i deleted all the contacts that i do not know personally... and apparently Sau Yan blocked me, and Syaza blocked me but i dont care, and a few other i know but i forgot their real names... i mean i sorta knew sau yan so why would she block me? hmm... whatever right? i mean she had more than one email, but the one she used to block me is the one that's IN use... oh well less contacts, less headaches, less people to annoy me by asking for my number and address... honestly i'm NOT flattered, rather freaked out...

i think i'd better sleep... or else mom will find out that i've not been sleeping at a fixed time, and whatever else will be messed up and i will get high blood pressure by the time i'm 19...

this one's all about hamsters!!!! Gosh they're soooo freaking cute!!!!!!!

i just read THE most beautiful post in my lifetime of reading posts///
and it was on Sau Yan's blog... i mean she's nice and all... we weren't friends per se, we were just in the same cca and we came to know each other and now i think i DO miss her... i hope she doesn't read this in case i say something that will offend her and make her hate me for the rest of my life...

it was really sweet, and it was so touching it almost made me crack up... oh gosh i'm starting to crack up!!! :'(

it was about Girl Guides... OMG i can't believe how much i miss them!!! But apparently not enough to want to go back everyday to see them! i dunno, but i'd feel kinda weird cause the sec 1s don't know me, the sec 2s don't really know me.... but the sec 3s and 4s kinda know me best... i meant better than the 1s and 2s... i dunno! i think i should go for guides on friday to see them... will they be happy to see me? will they be like, oh gosh it's the stupid bossy super strict senior that i never wanna see again! i dunno!!! so someone or something, help me!!!

reading Sau Yan's post reminded me of all the things the Girl Guides meant to me. It meant that i was part of something awesome, something that i would be proud of twenty, fifty years down the road... oh i'm gonna crack up soon... not yet...

okay... i didn't go to my aunt's baptism... i stayed home and watched Buffy The Vampire Slayer on VCD... i plead guilty for lying or changing my mind... whichever you guys wanna believe i did... the thing is that she didn't know that i was supposed to come right? anyway my mum didn't keep her promise, she said she was gonna drive me there and i wanted to go with my grandma but she said that my uncle was already downstairs waiting and i was still in the clothes that i slept in... and i stank...

so i didnt do much today... just sat in front if the tv and watched my Buffy The Vampire Slayer season 3... got a couple more VCDs to go before i finish watching the season, and on to the saving up to buy the next season!!!! And i have to look for season 2 first so i don't watch all the seasons but season 2 where so many things happen...

i hate the standing fan in my room, with that stupid net covering it... it's so bloody filthy and annoyingly smelly now... i'm gonna throw it away tomorrow, dunno what my mum put it there for... i mean the thing is gonna collect dust anyway, so i'll just clean it with the baby wipes that are oh so cheap... they're like a dollar twenty for a BIIIIGG packet... i don't hate the standing fan. i just hate it with the net on...

something is seriously wrong with the cd reader in this laptop... it can't read ANY cds!!!! officially freaking out right now!!!! damn!!! i'm gonna be so screwed if my mum finds out... bloody hell how am i gonna fix this? it's like i can't tell anyone or they'll tell my mum and like... it's so annoying... that i can't tell my mum anything...

okay so let me try a few music cds, and dvds.... nope it's not freakin working... i mean i used the laptop to rip some of my cds few days ago and it was fine... now it's bloody screwed up!!!! OMG i'm gonna cry...!!!! :'(
i mean i dunno what happened!!! Oh gosh i'm so screwed if my course needs me to put a cd into my laptop to like download a program and it's not bloody working...!!!! ow my head hurts from all the worrying...!!!! CD detector why have you failed me??!!!

i don't feel much like a teenager... i feel like a bloody grown up, or a kid... i'm neither here nor there you know? i'm freakishly like my mum and i'm this totally uninformed seventeen year old who knows nothing about relationships... it's not like i've been in a proper one ya know...? i mean i don't want to be a whore, or a tramp, or a slut... but for once i'd like to be taken care of by someone else...

i dunno if this is insecurity...? or is it just me obsessing with boys/guys/dudes again... i locked away my heart from most of the world so that no one can ever know how much i had been hurt by my first bf that practically no one knew about except a few people whom i trust... and a couple of people i've had a falling out with... i dunno what to do when i like a guy... and if he likes me i dunno how to go about making that first move you know? it sucks... literally... not knowing what to do, how to act, who to talk to and what to wear...

i mean i dunno if i'll ever make new friends, or if i'll get a bf, or if i'll ever get over not being cared for by a special someone... maybe i'm PMS-ing again, or is it just the way i'm feeling again? i got mixed emotions about going for the orienteering and starting school now... i wish there was a someone special whom i could talk to... i know nikki and gen and everybody else are like the greatest friends a girl can ever have, but sometimes i'd want someone else... and it's that someone who gives me that warm fuzzy feeling, that dizzy daydream and the butterflies in my stomach... somehow, i've managed to meet a couple of guys even though i've been in a convent for ten years and there was only that one guy who made me feel all that... after that, i think i've become numb... it's like i can't tell or i can't feel anymore... it's like i've become so numb because i was hurt so deeply... it's like what they say: the first cut is the deepest... and i know exactly what they meant... i can't feel all the butterflies or the fuzzy feeling anymore... in that aspect i've just gone so numb...

enough emo-ing for one post. i'll check in tomorrow night... in 24 hours...

Went for Good Friday mass at St Joseph's Church in town today... it was ok, almost died from the pain i experienced from wearing the too tight heels... i'm never doing that again...

this involves a certain asswipe-ish person. Let's just call him 'the asswipe' ok? so nikki and i were looking for the asswipe, to find out if he was there in the church with his family... he didn't pick up the call but he replied to the message, he was in the church...

after the mass and the procession, bumped into the asswipe's friend, let's call him 'the idiot' lah. so bumped into the idiot, then the asswipe, they were lining up in the same queue at a hawker centre across the church... the bloody motherfucker asswipe didn't even say hi to me, he only said hi to nikki. so i'm like, WTF you don't know my name now? or am i transparent? if you don't say hi, then just smile or whatever... ain't that basic courtesy? i mean we're not best of buddies but neither are we enemies ya know?

but whatever, feet hurts like crap and i'm like damn sleepy... i'm gonna doze off in a few... but i'll get this post done first. oh gosh my eyes can hardly stay opened... so the new laptop is giving me problems and i'm sorta freaking out... i can't rip anymore cds. i mean the thing can't detect the cd when it's inside it... i don't know what i did ya know? if this one screws up now, i'll be so fucked up i'll die... it's like scaring the shit out of me... it can't detect the cds that i put in, the media player said that the system doesn't have a cd driver... and i was like, WTF this CANNOT be happening!!!!

Well what can i say about today?
Went to pick up my O level cert from school, then headed to the library to hang until it was time to go to give tuition. i was late, by ten to fifteen minutes... i couldn't afford another cab ride to amk, it's too bloody expensive... i could spend like 8 bucks from sengkang to amk hub!!! like WTF man... i'm not made of money ya know?

so right now, it's 3.33am on Good Friday. Thank goodness it's a public holiday! If not I'd have to work the night and i'd be too tired to clean the house. Yes, i've taken a liking to cleaning the house these days... i'm gonna clean the floor tomorrow with that five inch long sponge that my dear mother calls a mop. It's not a mop mom, it's a sponge.

when i went back to school, saw my seniors from GG. Anna, who's also in SP, Samantha Choy and Jaclyn.... it was good to see them again... i'm happy... Anna's in school of Maritime Academy... i think that's how it's supposed to be spelt... oh well... it was just nice to see them again... then i met Priya from 2H '05 on the way out... then i saw Ally outside sitting at the bus stop waiting for Nicole to come... told her that i couldnt stay as i was already late for tuition... i wonder how they worked it out... she looks so preeety with her rebonded hair... the bangs suit her well too!!!

then chatted with Jude a bit online... then had to rush off the have dinner with my brother... then came back home cause we da bao-ed... after watching 4 episodes of Buffy the Vampire Slayer season 3, came back to my room, turned on the laptop and started watching The Perfect Man vcd on it... at the same time i chatted with Sasithorn a little bit!!! okay for most of the movie we were chatting... only because my stupid internet kept cutting off and i have to like wait for it to reconnect.. i think from now own i'll stick to blogging at Mac's... at least the connection there doesn't suck and i have my own free account for three years now!!! how cool is that? just nice for my years on poly... :) i'm happy :D

so Sasithorn promised to bring me to a gay club in Pattaya when i get the chance to go there on my own... it's gonna be so hot! lols! she was, or rather, he was like, "they're damn pretty i tell you!"
and there i was in front of the screen thinking,"ROFL!!!! much?"
it's gonna be hot man.. lols... like Paris Hilton? "That's hot!"
yeah i'm kinda going nuts. i always do at this time in the middle of the night... i just can't freaking sleep... :(

basically, i'm trying to load as many songs as possible into my laptop, so that i can have my music station wherever and whenever i go to school! yeah, besides my phone lah... the reason i want to get that iPod 160GB classic, is so that i can store as many songs as i want from all the CDs that i have without having to worry that there may not be enough space for everything. Plus, i can also store videos! Yayness!!! But that's gonna take a while to come, cause i gotta save up and all that crap... so that's it! First hols of poly, i'm gonna get a job where i can work like full time hours to save up some cash for rainy days or something... i mean i haven't exactly been thrifty these past few months since i started earning money for my own expenses... i mean i even paid for the my own bus fare and it's NOT cheap... i mean like F lah!!!!

i mean THAT's what i've been trying to tell my mum the whole time... i've been bloody paying adult fares, and sometimes i finish really late on Fridays, i take the bus after 11pm and it's like the peak hours and i pay more than a dollar for
ONE freaking bus ride... and on my way to tuition, i have to change buses NO MATTER what... so do you honestly think that it's NOT possible that $20 will barely last me slightly more than 2 weeks? And if i go to town, ONE mrt ride to Orchard Road is like $2... i know you were not born yesterday mother, but really i'm not trying to fool you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! its the effing truth, but shw won't believe me even if i'd cut my wrist to prove her wrong...

well i just thought that i should update. it's been awhile since the last post.
a lot has happened since then though...

went to register at SP on Monday, or yesterday whatever... got my laptop~~!!!~~
now i'm one super excited girl, waiting for my orientation camp for School of Design to start and stuff... gonna quit my job at the clinic to study but i'm still gonna give tuition to that kid... even though he's kinda driving me up the wall with his lack of knowledge...

no i'm not over Christian Siriano yet... i'm kind of rekindling my love for Austin Scarlett from Project Runway season 1... he's so hot and he takes pride in his looks... ooooooh.... lols.... i'm going crazy over guys again... right now i'm listening to Jesse McCartney and falling in love with him all over again...!!!! much love Jesse!!! one thing i love about this guy is that he's so faithful to his girlfriend, she's soooo lucky to have him...

been having splitting headaches again and i don't know why, but it's freaking annoying...!!!!! Some one shoot me in the head and get it over with already! Meeting Nicole later today at 12 at amk... going to follow her to collect her passport so that she can go to JB with Ellie on Thursday and stuff... i dunno what's up with Ellie nowadays, she's like cancelling on Nicole last minute and SHE was the one who didn't like last minute stuff... and look at what she's doing! Ah whatever, my head hurts too much to think right now...

i think i should change my blog layout again... it's getting pretty boring with only red, black and white...

and clara's acting pretty weird and stuff... i mean if a person doesn't want to go to paya lebar from sengkang, is that so wrong? it's a bloody long bus ride and stuff, it's not that long if i travel from sengkang to amk to town by bus... in fact it's so much faster... if i don't talk about the transport costs, then i'll talk about how uncomfortable i would feel in a Christian church... i mean there's nothing wrong with the religion, but there are problems within my family caused by those who converted to Christians. HELL some one nearly died over that conflict because they were so devastated.... i wont say much about that here, it's too personal...

so my mum's gonna allow me to join dancesport in SP just because it's FOC and it's a CCA... NOW i can do something i love and get recognition for it... yayness~~!!!! i guess i should be getting some shut eye... it's like 2.35AM on Wednesday 19th March... lols...

yes this is emo thursday according to my blog, certainly this post is about thursday when its technically friday at 1.30am. i just can't sleep, no matter how tired i feel. anyway, i got the greatest news of all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! this really really really really really really really really made my day..... eh hem... (clears throat)

CHRISTIAN SIRIANO WON PROJECT RUNWAY 4!!!!!!!

this was THE best thing that I've ever heard this whole time I've been so miserable in my own little world down in the dump.... the dude's so bloody talented, DUH he deserves to win! and like WTF he's only 22!!! Yes! Yes! Yes! YAY!!!!!! (pops open a bottle of champagne) Let's celebrate shall we? (dances around the campfire) ba da ba ba ba da CHIHUAHUA!!!! Lols... this is the only thing that's made me this happy besides getting my pay and going shopping with ah shi and her friend smita... oh yea, ah shi is AKA clara. yupp, she likes being called that so i'm gonna start calling her that too, and i've changed her name in my phone to ah shi also... lols...

well, i like to live in my fantasy world. when i'm being sucked back into reality i become so miserable, i've already gone 40% insane... and ironically it's all thanks to my mother. yes, mummy dearest has finally drove her only daughter 40% insane by sucking her back to reality like every other day she's trying to live her life as a normal happy teenager. so like, are teenagers SUPPOSED to care about who's gonna pay your school fees, your food, your clothes? i don't know but i have a feeling that i might be growing up too fast. but the good news is that i'm not promiscuous like some other horny girls who try to get laid 20 times before they turn 21... but it might be nice to have someone else to care about me besides my family and friends who are oh-so-important to me.

well i'm going for a bloody health check tomorrow, in order to be fully enrolled into SP... well i might have a slight psychiatric problem as some of my friends are aware of... but yes i appear as normal as a blade of grass, and underneath that blade of grass is the mind that's about to gradually so crazy. all i'm saying is that if i continue living like this, i'll go completely mad and may end up in the Institute of Mental Health at Buangkok Green.... and who's to blame? why no one but me right? because i am responsible for my own well being and my mother is never to blame for whatever shit happens to me? yup, this is how i see it.... i'm being so passive...

there's so many things to do before i get enrolled into my poly... OMG i'm gonna die!!!!! and where the fuck am i gonna get the cash to pay for my freaking laptop??? my mum's definately not paying for it... now i regret spending my CNY ang bao money on clothes and other stuff that i need.... FUCKING HELL... i'll have to save up like SHIT from now on... during my first holiday i'm gonna get a part-time job at Zara, they pay like $7/hr so that's like HUGE difference for what i get from working at the clinic... see i only work like a maximum of 6-7 hours a week and i get 5.80 an hour and i only work on wednesdays and fridays... BUT if i worked at Zara, i work 5 days a week and an average of 5 hours a day, i get a HELL lot more... that should be enough to pay for the laptop if i pay by installments...

URGH!!! I'm gonna die working my ass off to pay for my own living cost... and i'm freaking 17!!!!!!!! and there's like so much politics in the clinic i don't even wanna think about that!!! FUCK, what am i gonna do???? now i understand how nicole feels... damn this sucks!!!! like &^%*^$%&$#*&*^(*&_(*&&*%&^$#^%$%&^(*))!!!!!!!!!! yes, the language is too colourful so i decided to censor it...

i'm just bloody frustrated with my life. and my mum is expecting me to work part-time so that i provide for myself, AND she won't have to give me allowence, pay for my necessities and all the bull shit... but WTF!!!!!!!!!! i wanna die so bad... so that i won't have to go through this SHIT... OMG i'm just so EFFING pissed!!!!! i don't know when was the last time i was this ticked off!!!!!!! oh yea yesterday with the whole lying shit that happened... FUCK LAH i'm swearing so SUE me... just can't stand this crap anymore...

something that i saw at the clinic today ticked me off.
so there's this girl who's a collegue of mine, has internship the whole of this month and the first half of April. i volunteered to cover for her on tuesdays. yes, i freaking committed myself to help her out, so that she can concentrate on her internship and not worry about who's gonna cover for her.

THEN came this sms from one of the 'senior staff' from the clinic. she says that i don't have to cover for the girl anymore because the remaining people working that night can manage without my help. i said okay, no problems...

BUT,

what i saw today, at the clinic really got me thinking.....



SO, we have this little form in a nice little file... where we would write our names on when we need people to cover for us... the people who can take the shift can cover will write their names on the days that they can take over... what i saw, was my name being cancelled and another girl's name was written at my slot. so i guessed as much, that when they said that they didn't need my help, they meant that they REPLACED me. in other words, they effing lied to me.

the first thing that came to my mind was,


HHHMMMMM... ...


someone please tell me that i have the right to be mad....

today was kinda cool... went to nikki's place to bake cookies again... they came out great in the end... with the extra walnuts and what not... too bad nobody but my brother likes to eat cookies, so i'll be super selfish and give them to my friends and my two aunts who loved the first batch that i baked... cool eh? at least someone else appreciates my cookies besides my brother...

well nikki wasnt feeling too good by the time i left her place, i think she need to rest... anyway we're watching meet the spartans with rachel b on saturday... it's gonna be so fun...

i don't remember being this interested in fasion, it's just recently i've been into the runway shows, fasion mags, victoria beckham and what not... i don't know... i have so many interests, a few of them are what i am passionate about like music, fashion, design and dancing... i also don't remember my brain feeling this lethargic, i think the throbbing headache's coming back... oh joy!

well, my wisdom tooth's growing and i think that it's the cause of my grumpiness...
yeah it's bloody irritating me, and i'm irritating the hell out of my friends... and i wonder why some of them are not picking up the phone when i call... oh well i guess i gotta suck it up and not be sucha whiner... i have to suck it up, show up for work, put on my game face, when i get critisized i'll give my poker face... uh, this sucks.

how many times do i say,"this sucks" in one week's worth of posts? uh, i got dizzy counting... i HATE being fake. i could never keep the act of being so FAKE at all... i like to do what i call, straight to the heart talk. i say exactly what i think, not caring about what other people may say. in other words, i like to be extremely blunt with everyone, my words will cut them like a sharp knife.

i'm feeling fierce now. No more emo shit so yea...
Chrisitan Siriano's personality is really rubbing off me.
But i've got a lot to learn before i show my confidence.
Maybe i should go to LaSalle after poly, study fashion design...
That'll be so freaking cool!!! Then i could go to London like Christian...
That's is my ultimate fantasy, meeting Christian...
When i told Nikki that i thought that he's so emo-ey hot,
she literally wanted to slap me over the SMS... LOLS!!!
i simply can't get enough of him, i'm totally psycho now...
i love music, fasion and designing stuff...
Creative media design is just a stepping stone for me,
i would LOVE to study fasion design Part-time while i'm working and stuff...
i know i'm not supergirl, but i have to do SOMETHING with my life...

i have come to the conclusion that i should live life
to the fullest no matter what the fuck happens to me.
even if i were to meet in an accident, if needed, i'll
get whatever operation and get back on board my life.
i want to be able to live each day to the fullest, but
why the hell is it so hard?

everytime i'm feeling good about something, something or someone else has to spoil it for me. and i would be like, "holy shit! what the fuck is this supposed to mean?"
yes, in the previous post, i experienced something exactly like this. i've go so much thinking to do. i blew nicole off today, we were supposed to got for a joy ride on bus 100, exploring the ends of Singapore, but i wasn't feeling up to it. i'm still feeling really lethargic, dunno how i'm gonna face the sunrise tomorrow. i know that i owe her an explanation, i've got to talk to her tomorrow... no matter what...

i feel like i'm losing a lot of friends. LCA is one of them. i sent him a couple of emails, dunno if he read it, dunno if he wanted to reply, dunno if he still wants to be friends or not... it sucks really. and that recent DRAMA between me and HER, so i was like what the fuck is happening to me? or rather, why am i feeling like this? i don't want to seem like the most horrible person on earth! :'(
i don't know, it seems like wanting to be happy makes me the most horrible person ever! i have to put on a show everytime i go to work because of someone i love, because i don't want to embarrass them... i don't know what to do now! i'm like,"fuck! i wanted to quit but now i can't!"

THIS SUCKS SO BAD; I WANT TO DIE!!!!!

i don't even want to think about it, it makes me sad and it makes me wanna cry. Sweet, merciful crap. this is serious shit, and the worst thing is that i WAS feeling fierce like ten minutes ago, but now i am feeling not so much as fierce, more if pissed off, suffering in silence, and i can hardly breathe. Someone throw me a lifeline.

I am NOT emo people... I'm just feeling emo that's all...
I apologize for this font is too small for anyone but myself to read... haiz...
Yes I changed my layout again... The pic is so cute ain't it??

Well it's not much fun if you find out that your job is to help your mum make money...
I won't explain here, it's too personal... but just let me vent my anger ok?

Fucking hell! So that's what's this job is about?? FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!!!

I feel much better now...

Anyway I'm totally addicted to Project Runway...
I think that the fourth season is THE best of all the seasons...
Youtube is so awesome, thank God for all this technology!!!
It saved my life... Quite literally... if not I'd die of boredom...
I can't believe I'm becoming a fashion fanatic... Lols..
Anyway, I've fallen in love with Christion Siriano, one of the designers on
Project Runway 4... He's only 21~~~!!!! There's a chance that I can marry
him if I move to New York, but he's gay I think... Haiz...
Why do ALL cute guys HAVE to be gay???
Take a look here... He's the one doing the CATWALK!!!!!



I JUST LOVE HIM~~~~!!!!!!! HE'S FIERCE!!!!!!! <3<3<3<3<3<3<3